Remember how I mentioned I’d probably cry tonight?

Yeah, I did.

And wouldn’t you know it, I used my last travel Kleenex package last night at Youth Group and didn’t bother to throw another in my purse.

So I had to use my sleeve, which was lucky. I’d grabbed a sweater on my way out of the house just in case, and threw it on even though it wasn’t super cold out yet. I got there and noticed most of the people present were dressed nicely, so I put my sweater on. And then the other girl my age was in a tee, so whatever. Hah.

There were ten stones within the garden with students’ names on them.

At least ten graduates (or almost-grads–several, like M, died their senior years) dead in 15 years of this school building opening.

That’s ridiculous. Almost a student a year.

Are you kidding me?

Well, “Momma” did say after J died that we (as in our church) must be doing something right if we’re pissing the Devil off so much.

Add to that what YP brought up last night, that Satan attacks the strong ones, and … well, put it together for yourself.

But yeah, I cried tonight.

I took some photos, learned the story behind the garden, listened to our pastor call the families forward to place roses on their student’s stone, ate, and talked.

And cried.

It started with watching the families, then got worse when PD prayed, and finally, I broke when S hugged me. And then Momma, and it took me a minute to register that C was there, too, patting my back as I hugged Momma.

And then we ate food (bars, really, and punch) and talked.

I met the mother of one of the students who died several years ago, beginning with talking about the area we were in, the language classrooms.

What a conversation starter! Hah. =)

So yeah.

It was kinda rough, but it was good.

And then I came home and have been watching Criminal Minds.

Last ep, I learned that one’s love map is established by the age of six.


As in formed.

As in affected by more than just biology.


Just a little mini-rant from me.

And holy crap, Emily’s post tonight was relevant. I love God’s timing.

It is NOT your fault.

No matter how many times you think it is, it isn’t.

You may not have recognized the signs, but that doesn’t mean it’s your fault.

A lot of people don’t.

It just means we need to be more aware.