So, remember my [not-so-happy day yesterday]?
I left something out.
I meant to share it, and then didn’t for some reason.
So I’ll share it today! As part of Flawless Friday!
(PS: I made myself a banner for FF. Click the photo to see the original. I -heart- Picnik.)
While at the dentist, the “technician” (a woman who goes to our church whom I enjoy very much!) was asking me about life and such.
She asked about school, about J, you know—the usual conversational stuff.
But then she asked me if I have any friends my age with whom I can fellowship.
Um, no, not really.
Her response was something like, “So I guess that means you don’t really feel part of the youth group anymore?”
I almost cried.
Truth is, she’s right.
I don’t feel like part of the group anymore.
And it sucks.
I’m the only college kid who attends church regularly.
I don’t feel like the JHers necessarily need me. (Although one of them hugged me Wed night before I went home!)
I don’t always feel like YP needs me.
I don’t feel welcome,
in a sense much at all anymore.
When I was in junior high/high school, even when I didn’t feel like I fit in, I knew I was part of the group. I was a junior/high schooler, and I was involved in the youth group. I was part of something.
Now, as the only regularly attending college kid… it’s hard. I don’t really feel like part of the group anymore.
And I don’t feel like much of a leader, either.
It’s hard, this transition from teenager to not-a-teenager (I’ll be 20 in a couple of months).
It’s a tough position to be in: I’m still a student, and yet I’m given somewhat of a leadership role?
I mean, I took it on ecstatically this year (as opposed to last year, when I just did it to stay involved), but I’ve gone a little downhill lately. Hearing it from another person made it sink in a little more, I guess.
Come to think of it, I emailed YP (a long time ago, back when I emailed him like once a week) about this very problem: transitioning from student to leader while still being a student.
It stinks, feeling this way, and I hate crying, but right now I’m even MORE emotionally screwed up than usual, so I’m feeling like crying at every little thing.
-sigh- I guess that’s what I get for being a girl, huh?
But on the plus side, I suppose today’s [Month For Others] “Random Act of Kindness” has been done!
Ironically, it was to the lovely lady who started the MFO challenge.
Bad morning for Tina + encouragement from Becca (and others!) = happier Tina = happier Becca!
So I guess it’s kind of a cycle: doing something nice for someone else makes you feel a little better, too!
So what are you waiting for? Get in on the cheer-up-ing! So something nice for someone else. I promise it’ll brighten your day a little. 🙂