Today was the third and final part of our Raising G-rated Kids in an X-rated World sermon series.
Quick review of the last two weeks:
Week 1, kids need belief, presence, and memories.
Week 2, kids need encouragement, role models, and discipline.
7. Kids need affection.
1 John 3:18
Don’t just say you love your kids. Show them.
Pastor brought up the idea of healthy touch, and certain roadblocks such as unloving or absent parents.
He also brought up his own family, how he grew up in a Norweigan, not-huggy family. He decided that he was going to hug his kids.
He brought up Ole and Lena in connection to heritage. Ole and Lena were talking one day, and Lena said, “Ole, we’ve been married 35 years, and you never tell me you love me anymore. Do you still love me?” And Ole thought for a moment before replying, “Lena, I said I loved you on our wedding day. If I change my mind, I’ll let you know.”
Um. All right, Ole. Strike for you…
It’s important to not only tell people you love them, but also show them.
Each of us has a different love language. These are the ways we show love and prefer to be shown love.
Physical touch, quality time, gifts, words of affirmation, and acts of service.
I took the test and discovered that I am almost a tie between three. I think they were time, words, and touch. One was more prominent, but the numbers were quite close.
Anyway. Kids need affection—proper, healthy affection.
8. Kids need responsibility.
Pastor brought up a bunch of points with this thought.
There are three problems that come with responsibility. Parents are either apathetic (meaning they solve all their kids’ problems for them), place blame (“It’s not your fault you’re failing, the teacher just doesn’t know your learning style.”), or allow their kids to have a care-for-me attitude (don’t let the kid carry their own weight).
He talked about how as parents you are to ALLOW CONSEQUENCES, and not be too nice.
He brought up his family again, this time dealing with text messaging. When their family got cell phones, Pastor and his wife gave their son a 750/month plan, assuming it would be enough.
When they got the bill, they were very surprised.
They upped the number to 1500/month.
Another bill. Not happy again.
After that, they cancelled texting and came up with a plan to have their son pay off the bill, and only AFTER the large bill was paid was he allowed to start texting again.
They didn’t want to be Mr. & Mrs. Atilla the Hun, but something had to be done about the excessive bill. I guess they figured since their son was the one texting and going over his limit, he should pay the bill?
Then he brought up butterflies.
Have you ever watched a butterfly to break free of its chrysallis?
They squirm and wiggle and basically fight their way out of that thing.
You may want to help, and you may have very good intentions, but you DO NOT cut open a chrysallis. If you do, you ruin the butterfly’s wings and they are grounded for life.
The same is true for kids: you can’t always bail them out of every mistake they make, every trial they have to endure. You might want to, and you might think it’s helping, but it’s not to help as much as you think.
9. Kids need FUN!
The few things that I wrote down here were:
pressure to succeed
lighten up and schedule fun
Packing up—was about his son moving to Colorado this week (Air Force academy), and how Pastor’s wife had every intention of packing up his bedroom and throwing out things he didn’t need, etc. Except their son was not thrilled, and finally Mom realized why: it wasn’t fun. They needed time this past week to just be together and have fun.
Pastor’s pretty certain of it.
It might not be in the Bible (like Jesus wept), but Jesus was 100% God AND 100% human, and humans laugh!
Take time out to have fun.
10. Kids need a peaceful home.
The word for “peace” translates as “absence of war.”
We are in a battle 24/7. There is a battle for our souls.
We need to be a peace-filled people.
Kids need a place where they can hang out and be themselves, without worrying about pretending to be someone they’re not.
The atmosphere in your house should be one where kids feel safe to be themselves, a place where they can retreat when the pressures of life get to them.
And that was about it.
We had a baby dedication today. Super sweet.
The “Luxury Box Upgrade” thing was cool. (No, I didn’t nominate my dad. But I did give him a card with a very heart-felt note inside.)
We saw a preview of the musical that’s happening at church this coming weekend. That was neat.
I ran screen both services, so I got to hear the sermon twice.
I went to dinner with a coworker/friend last night, and then we went to see Pirates 4. I enjoyed it. The food was okay (this new place opened recently), but I don’t know that it would be first choice of place to go to again.
I have had this song stuck in my head the last couple of days, mostly because I’ve had it on Repeat on YouTube…
(PS. Guys. Frankenstein was the scientist, not the monster. He was known as Frankenstein’s Monster or something.)
I gave one of the guys from the media crew a hug after service and told him Happy Father’s Day. Because he’s kind of a grandfather to me. 🙂
Burgers for lunch.
Time to relax. Maybe take a nap.
The last few nights I haven’t been falling asleep until at least 1AM, which is really annoying.
Last night I spent part of my sleeplessness searching this encyclopedia thing that my parents bought me several years ago that I haven’t really used yet.
I looked up “God’s will.”
What I found was this definition:
God’s desire and wish for His people. The Father’s will is that those who believe on the Son will have eternal life and that none will be lost (John 6:39-40). The disciples of Jesus were taught to pray for God’s will to be done on earth as it in in heaven (Matt. 6:10). Paul urged the Christians at Rome to allow God to transform their minds to know the perfect will of God (Romans 12:2).
1 Thess. 4:3
1 Thess. 5:18
1 John 2:17
What throws me off about this is that God’s will is obviously salvation. Duh. He wants us to believe and be saved. But Mark says that by doing the will of God, we are Christ’s brothers and sisters; 1 Thess 4 that God’s will is for us to be sanctified and pure; 1 Thess 5 to give thanks in all circumstances for it is God’s will for our lives; and 1 John 2 that those who do God’s will will live forever.
Now, here’s my issue.
That second verse from 1 Thess. Is it saying that being thankful always (in essence) is God’s will for us? Or are the circumstances God’s will? Or is it something else entirely? My Bible and this encyclopedia thing don’t say.
Is God’s will that we are saved? That we are continuously thankful? That we are sanctified and pure? That we do what he commands? Or are all of those somehow interconnected?
I can see how He can work in all things to make good.
I can see how He can work through me in whatever college or career I choose.
What I can’t see is the bigger picture.
Will this particular college be a better fit for me than another? (Maybe.) Will it help me better understand my strengths and talents? (Hopefully.) Will it help me decide on a career that will fit me and help me do what I love while allowing me to share Jesus? (Hoping so.) Would a different college be a better fit? (Guess I’ll find out after my first semester or so.)
So I suppose I can’t know for sure. But I do know that there are ceratin gifts and abilities than God has given me, and that I can most definitely find a way to use them for Him. And one day I’ll look Him in the eye and get “Well done, good and faithful one.”
Sometimes I’d love for God to pop up in front of me and say “This is what you’re going to do with your life.” But I guess that doesn’t give me free will, does it? …Well, actually, it could. I could still choose a different path, or attitude. Jonah ran away from God even after he’d been told what to do, and eventually went back and did it the right way.
Even if God were to give me some sort of concrete sign, it might not be something I’d WANT to do, and I’d run. “No way, God, you’ve got the wrong girl.” And He would persist, like He did with Jonah or Moses.
I guess what it comes down to is trust.
Trusting that God knows what He’s doing with
certain every circumstance.
Trusting that He is going to work through whatever I choose to do with my life.
Trusting that I can do anything I put my mind to, as long as I remember to rely on Him.